personal advise based on true story

[xeann]

don't start a relationship with someone you think wont work out and get yourself hurt in the end.

I met this PRC girl from work 2yr plus back, shes a pretty and chatty girl, the type of girl with a lot of male friends, she came to singapore to study since primary school and decided to stay in singapore to work while her siblings is still studying here.

As she is very chatty i talk to her alot during working hours, to know that she came from quite a rich family, her family can afford to send 4 children to study in singapore, which is not very easily for majority of the china Chinese family.

I went out with her alot of times for meals for entertainment and fall for her eventually, i even broke off with my sg gf to be together to her, even i knew that my parents will object eventually, as my family is reputable they felt that its quite tiu nian to get married to a PRC girl.

we had been together for about 2 yrs, my family still objects to it, for myself, i am quite a haolian person also, so i only tell my close friends that i have a prc girlfriend, for those whom don't know me well, or not close to me i will just tell them the girl is from singapore, as you all bros know, people will look at you quite differently if they knew that your gf is from china.

the 2 years together with her, is the happiest time of my life till now, we visited many places i even went back to china with her to show face to her parents..

things eventually worsen, and we break off. now i misses her so much. its all because of my parents objection, and myself, i just cant bring myself to tell my friends that i am seeing a prc girlfriend.

sometimes i tell myself things might be better for me this way, since i cant take the fact shes a prc, but deep down my heart i know i want this girl.

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

piece of advice to bro out there: choose your life partner carefully.. dont end up to be someone like me hurt and helpless. cant forget her

[Feymann]

You're probably sharing the story to close up on the past chapter. It's good to let it out. Anyway,
I know how that feels bro..I have an ex whom I love but we cant be together. Her family dun really approve of me, neither does mine. We were going to settle down but eventually, she broke down first due to external pressure from family and friends. We're both single for a while now. But I cant stop thinking of her even when I'm with other girls. It hurts not to be together, so I only hope that she can find someone better than me to look after her:)

[Oakley76]

I think everyone comes across a relationship that really hurts us somehow.

I came to know a girl from club, loves her truly. In the end, she slept with my best friend. I forgave her and thought she would change. TO be frank, she tried hard to win my trust back.

Just recently, she pulled the same stunts again. Not answering calls, sms at certain periods of the day... Deep down, I feel she is lying though she denied she was out.. Just to share, when I contronted her abt my best fren, she knelt down and swore she was innocent (but actual fact they had a month's relationship). With that, whatever she says now seems not to be credible

Damn, why do we need to go thru all these?

[Joris]

Its the obstacles in our life and along the way we grow and learn from it as well.

[Ziek's Nick]

Ya... we learn alot along the way.
just don't do the same mistake again!

[Royster79]

Frankly speaking, whats wrong with marrying a PRC?? I dun think its that throw face. Our ancestors all came from china also. :confused:

[FrOsTy-CoLd]

I think everyone comes across a relationship that really hurts us somehow.

I came to know a girl from club, loves her truly. In the end, she slept with my best friend. I forgave her and thought she would change. TO be frank, she tried hard to win my trust back.

Just recently, she pulled the same stunts again. Not answering calls, sms at certain periods of the day... Deep down, I feel she is lying though she denied she was out.. Just to share, when I contronted her abt my best fren, she knelt down and swore she was innocent (but actual fact they had a month's relationship). With that, whatever she says now seems not to be credible

Damn, why do we need to go thru all these?

Hi, just a thought. How about men who sleep around behind their wife or galfriends back? Women go thru all these most.:mad:

[PepperO]

Bros and Sis,

The way I see it, it's all a matter of choice. We have to bear the consequences of our decisions/actions, which may be heartbreaking at times.

But isn't life more about the journey than the destination?

I have been through difficult trials myself, but they have also helped me become the person that I am today.

Hope everyone comes out of their pain victorious. :)

[onlyhuman]

Frankly speaking, whats wrong with marrying a PRC?? I dun think its that throw face. Our ancestors all came from china also. :confused:

i totally agree with you...if our ancestors did not come here...we are all PRC too

[sun814]

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

[xeann]

i totally agree with you...if our ancestors did not come here...we are all PRC too

true, but i guess my family is quite thinking is quite conservative, they don't really like it, now that the relationship between us had end, it might be something good for me though. i guess bros out there might have family with the same thinking as my family and understand what im talking about

[turbo_slk200]

she came to singapore to study since primary school and decided to stay in singapore to work while her siblings is still studying here.

her family can afford to send 4 children to study in singapore, which is not very easily for majority of the china Chinese family.



Yo bro TS.....

I kinda feel for you... especially she is not a WL.....

Also, the points you highlighted above are further proof that there is nothing to be ashamed of. She should be able to converse well in English and fit in to sillypore society. Plus she is well-to-do, and definitely not with you for the $$$ !

You can try to explain to your parents again with the points I mentioned in this post.

Good luck !

[turbo_slk200]

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

bro sun814.... congratz on finding your happiness !!

I am sure your story is what many ppl wants to hear, especially all those playing the KC game.

[see see only]

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

:eek: Young Man .... errrrr...

A gentle reminder - is year 2010 liao :D .............. (+ july got world cup wahaahaaahaa)

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.


Bro sun814,

me salute you x 1000 times :)

WE choose our own path ... not others :)

[sun814]

thanks. indeed living happily now. the funny thing is some people thought that i am from prc too as i sometimes speak mandarin with a slang too nowadays. maybe it is because i am so used to it now. personally i think i am 新加坡人 and also 中国人 (in the broader sense, haha even though those from prc may not recognise this).

[wewe2010]

Frankly speaking, whats wrong with marrying a PRC?? I dun think its that throw face. Our ancestors all came from china also. :confused:

Agreed...

If it is true love both ways... why bother what others have to say... It is more of the society's perception towards the PRC.... don't forget, there are always good men/women in every country, as long as the two of you really love each other, the rest is not important already....

Cheers!!! :):):)

[Oopsx2010]

...................
the 2 years together with her, is the happiest time of my life till now, we visited many places i even went back to china with her to show face to her parents..

things eventually worsen, and we break off. now i misses her so much. its all because of my parents objection, and myself, i just cant bring myself to tell my friends that i am seeing a prc girlfriend.

sometimes i tell myself things might be better for me this way, since i cant take the fact shes a prc, but deep down my heart i know i want this girl.

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.........


TS,

Maybe your this prc girlfriend is better off without you! :rolleyes:

I think the greatest obstacle is not from your parents but you. Your pride and ego! Would you have made a different decision if you have only a year or two to live?

Anyway, want to dedicate this song to you... hope you find the courage to overcome all obstacles.

YouTube - Collin Raye - Love me [with lyrics] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUvN5F6ZIy8&feature=related)

[xeann]

TS,

Maybe your this prc girlfriend is better off without you! :rolleyes:

I think the greatest obstacle is not from your parents but you. Your pride and ego! Would you have made a different decision if you have only a year or two to live?

Anyway, want to dedicate this song to you... hope you find the courage to overcome all obstacles.

YouTube - Collin Raye - Love me [with lyrics] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUvN5F6ZIy8&feature=related)

thanks bro

[showa]

I agree with with bro 0opsx2010, the greatest obstacle is yourself not your parent nor peer pressure. The general stereotype prc, is due to many bad press. Even our own sg girl there are many bad egg too. If she is really from a regular family and home what there to be ashame of? Bro if she is really the one for you in life dun let it go just because of your ego and pride. Dun regret decades down the road that you have not make the right decision.
search your heart, see you really wanted.

[cereal-killer]

we had been together for about 2 yrs, my family still objects to it, for myself, i am quite a haolian person also, so i only tell my close friends that i have a prc girlfriend, for those whom don't know me well, or not close to me i will just tell them the girl is from singapore, as you all bros know, people will look at you quite differently if they knew that your gf is from china.

the 2 years together with her, is the happiest time of my life till now, we visited many places i even went back to china with her to show face to her parents..


you are complaining that your family objects to your relationship with a CHINESE PRC ? wait till you get involved with a singaporean Eurasian, Indian or Malay. what then? Object also ?

When i was wonder, i was always involved with a Minah, some good, some bad but they were Awesome. Family object and got married with a singapore chinese, and what happened after that ? she had extra-martial affair, and i caught her, divorced...

You're wondering what happened to the Minahs i knew ? they are Happily married for YEARS already.

[Oopsx2010]

thanks bro

..... Even our own sg girl there are many bad egg too.....

Errrr... I'm a SG gal ;)

[xeann]

i guess my story wasnt as bad as some as the experience by bros here..

will think about it and hope things might work out the best way for me

thanks alot bros

[cereal-killer]

it WILL work out la... TRUST ME

If no girl leaves, how can a BETTER one come along ?

After my minahs left, better one came along (until i hit a wall with my ex-wife)
but after 3 years, I got a Jennifer Lopez look-a-like and married her :)
she's way better than all the minahs put together (on and off the bed) :P

CHEER UP bro... Who Knows!! Maybe some day you will bump into her and every thing will work out again ?

[Rongxing]

Bro Xeann,

You broke with your China GF because of face? What face? What's wrong to marry a PRC?

I travel to China regularly for over a decade and I can assure you that they're much richer than our Singaporean family. Most of the girls there are very well educated and conservative. Don't let a few WL PRC in Singapore to influence your decision. It's your happiness grab it.:D

[salohcineew]

Hi bro.

i am really sorry to read about your story.

Is happened to me when I was 21 years. I know this lady from from NS buddy. I really Love her so much until today I can forgave about her. The last thing I saw was at the changi Hospital.

Now I am 42 married with a happy family, good wife and a healthy, playful and loving boy. My advice to you, your life need to carrying on, go out mixed around. Do not buried yourself at home.

All the best.

[Niceman]

of the girls there are very well educated and conservative.

Conservative?? lolx.... zhun boh??? outside wear conservative, inside as hot as volcano.... in bed, they machiam Jap AV stars

[letsdo]

WE choose our own path ... not others :)

Bro well said, and we are responsible for the outcome and our own happiness, not others :cool:

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine?

Thx bro for sharing, me salute you too :D

[letsdo]

Bro Xeann,

You broke with your China GF because of face? What face? What's wrong to marry a PRC?



I would prefer to marry a PRC than a SG materialized girl ....

[Niceman]

Errrr... I'm a SG gal ;)

Nice song, sister..... bring back alot of memory........... tears dripping... :(

[Niceman]

i guess my story wasnt as bad as some as the experience by bros here..

Your story nothing bad... but is full rubbish... you are merely creating a sad and dramatic story for yourself. From the start, is your ego to be with her, even went to meet her parents, and your ego not to tell your friends she's PRC, and your ego to break away... and your ego to sit in this so-called "sorrows" and "love".

Wake up, your family may be rich, but you are not. You are depending heavily on them. Guess your 1st card, 1st car or your money to go china all from them.

Sorry for being rude, but is the fact. Seen too much

But, 1 thing I envy u, you have your future secured and pathed, much better than alot. Very tired fighting for a career alone.

You have a good job for me? :D

[Bittersweet Guy]

my sis-in-law is a PRC. My Ex-gf is a PRC. I am working in a PRC company with over a dozen of PRC colleagues. Should I jump down out of my window now, Mr TS?

I can give tons of political / social / cultural reasons why I can accept PRC into my life. Can you give ONE REASON why it is being shameful to be associated with them? :confused::confused:

[assrammer]

in life, we're all the same, same colour blood, different skin colour only. (quote dalai lama) can we not see it as love for another human being? man or woman? is there really a superior being? an inferior being? it's all our culture and perception only lor. how our society or organization force certain ethnicity to do certain things that may seem politically incorrect, but their survival depends on how they get around the situation, and when survival is at stake, humans will do whatever it takes, when that happens, the ugly side emerges.

maybe this is a bit hard to swallow, hell, even i think it's a bit extreme, but ain't that the truth my bros? people are always affected by what the society think we should do or behave or lead our lives. i too am subjected to that, but i will not bow down to conformity. i will do whatever i please, love whoever i fancy, live the way i want, and society dun agree with me, then fuck them, i will decide how to live my life, not society.

[coolteng]

bro xeann if u love her so much, y u care so much abt where she came fr ???:cool:

[VanGogh]

TS, did you realise that u had posted your thread twice :rolleyes:

http://www.sammyboyforum.com/adult-discussions-about-sex/176215-personal-advice-based-true-story-choose-your-life-partner-carefully.html

[Niceman]

i will do whatever i please, love whoever i fancy, live the way i want, and society dun agree with me, then fuck them, i will decide how to live my life, not society.

Well done bro... up u la

[Oink Oink]

We gain some, we lose some, irregardless of nationality, race, wealth....... so long as you are a human being living on earth.

人心难测 水难量. Change is not just a constant in environment but also in people. Might be a blessing in disguise for you. 月老 also cannot promise anyone 白头到老.

既已是往事 不可眷恋.

If you don't let it go, you can't move on. Even if you can, you can't go far.

[weiwei09]

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

Congrats bro..I am 24 and I have a sg gf. Last year I met this gal from PRC, she's 26. We became close and got tgr. She's married with a kid. Her husband incurred alot of debts. I got to know her at a HC. We're madly in love with each other. She loves me for real. She say she wont accept it if I break up w my gf to be w her. The only way for us to be tgr is if her hubby got an affair and my gf initiated a break up w me. She said she dun dare to think about us being tgr in future, cos she's scared she'll face alot of external pressure..even though she is already a pr..

Well, our society still cannot accept prcs..not even when they have attained citizenship. TS I feel for you, but well at least you tried. I can really emphatise with you. For me i really dunno where my r/s is getting to. But I realli hope I can be with her someday.

[weiwei09]

I would prefer to marry a PRC than a SG materialized girl ....

I totally second that..I am so much happier with her than my sg gf...

[Glock]

your family either love you or do not

either your judgement is correct or it is not

is it always that your parents are right and you are wrong ? or is it the other way round ? you must ask yourself this

if you are sure - then they will come to see your way

singapore bitch make your life shit

you want to suffer forever just so your family think like they dont lose face ?

singapore not paradise best place in the world to live

when china even richer and more powerful , is it suddenly suppose to marry PRC ?

leave singapore


don't start a relationship with someone you think wont work out and get yourself hurt in the end.

I met this PRC girl from work 2yr plus back, shes a pretty and chatty girl, the type of girl with a lot of male friends, she came to singapore to study since primary school and decided to stay in singapore to work while her siblings is still studying here.

As she is very chatty i talk to her alot during working hours, to know that she came from quite a rich family, her family can afford to send 4 children to study in singapore, which is not very easily for majority of the china Chinese family.

I went out with her alot of times for meals for entertainment and fall for her eventually, i even broke off with my sg gf to be together to her, even i knew that my parents will object eventually, as my family is reputable they felt that its quite tiu nian to get married to a PRC girl.

we had been together for about 2 yrs, my family still objects to it, for myself, i am quite a haolian person also, so i only tell my close friends that i have a prc girlfriend, for those whom don't know me well, or not close to me i will just tell them the girl is from singapore, as you all bros know, people will look at you quite differently if they knew that your gf is from china.

the 2 years together with her, is the happiest time of my life till now, we visited many places i even went back to china with her to show face to her parents..

things eventually worsen, and we break off. now i misses her so much. its all because of my parents objection, and myself, i just cant bring myself to tell my friends that i am seeing a prc girlfriend.

sometimes i tell myself things might be better for me this way, since i cant take the fact shes a prc, but deep down my heart i know i want this girl.

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

piece of advice to bro out there: choose your life partner carefully.. dont end up to be someone like me hurt and helpless. cant forget her

[sun814]

Originally Posted by sun814
If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

Congrats bro..I am 24 and I have a sg gf. Last year I met this gal from PRC, she's 26. We became close and got tgr. She's married with a kid. Her husband incurred alot of debts. I got to know her at a HC. We're madly in love with each other. She loves me for real. She say she wont accept it if I break up w my gf to be w her. The only way for us to be tgr is if her hubby got an affair and my gf initiated a break up w me. She said she dun dare to think about us being tgr in future, cos she's scared she'll face alot of external pressure..even though she is already a pr..

Well, our society still cannot accept prcs..not even when they have attained citizenship. TS I feel for you, but well at least you tried. I can really emphatise with you. For me i really dunno where my r/s is getting to. But I realli hope I can be with her someday.

My case is even made worse because my wife is older than me by 3 years (she is 42 already), haha, so not old cow eating young grass. :D Maybe my parents are afraid that she cannot bore them a grand-child (i m the only son in the family and first time marriage). To me true love is hard to come by, so must treasure them.

[77guy]

don't start a relationship with someone you think wont work out and get yourself hurt in the end.

I met this PRC girl from work 2yr plus back, shes a pretty and chatty girl, the type of girl with a lot of male friends, she came to singapore to study since primary school ................................... i just cant bring myself to tell my friends that i am seeing a prc girlfriend.

sometimes i tell myself things might be better for me this way, since i cant take the fact shes a prc, but deep down my heart i know i want this girl.

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

piece of advice to bro out there: choose your life partner carefully.. dont end up to be someone like me hurt and helpless. cant forget her

T/S, wake up ur bloody idea, dun cum here post and act pity or try blaming ur parents for the fail relationship, u urself say tat u felt ashame to let others koe shes a prc, if u realli luv her, u wont mind at all...so dun act pity, i zap u for tat.

[Elwina]

Love is something prolly very great and almighty to some girls. Choosing between living your life with regrets or living your life with fulfilment and happiness everyday is another. You choose your own path and which every way you are going to choose, do not push any future resentment to any other people and who says loving someone is easy? To genuinely love means sacrifices have to be made. And, being a PRC there is nothing wrong only sad thing is that they are mostly categorized under the "bad egg" basket.

I do have friends who married proper PRC girls too.. and of course faces alot of negative "music" from relatives and family and now they are happily married with twins..

Just take into consideration that in the future, this is the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with and not others (including your parents) parents tend to leave you but a soul mate is hard to come by.

Jia You TS.. just remember you live your life for yourself and no one else and you DO NOT have to care about what others say and ONLY be resposible for your own actions ! :)

El

[justin low]

If only there are PRC girls during my younger days, i would have chosen a PRC over a Sillypore girl. You re damm stupid..

Bring your parents to china for holidays and you can see how rich the cheena people are.

[Elwina]

If only there are PRC girls during my younger days, i would have chosen a PRC over a Sillypore girl. You re damm stupid..

Bring your parents to china for holidays and you can see how rich the cheena people are.


Yes totally agree.. the rich can be quite rich over in china.. totally impressed!!

[sun814]

haha, quite true, my wife has quite a collection of gold, jewelleries, branded watches and handbags when we got married. :p

[simple2kee]

TS.. just remember you live your life for yourself and no one else and you DO NOT have to care about what others say and ONLY be responsible for your own actions ! :)


i agreed with u. we are responsible for our own action, no 1 else. :)

[Oink Oink]

Yes totally agree.. the rich can be quite rich over in china.. totally impressed!!

The rich people there are filthy rich!! 20 or 30 years down the road, the PRCs may be looking down on us for our kiasu, kiasi.... si mi boon kia...lah!!

[spready]

Originally Posted by sun814
If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .



My case is even made worse because my wife is older than me by 3 years (she is 42 already), haha, so not old cow eating young grass. :D Maybe my parents are afraid that she cannot bore them a grand-child (i m the only son in the family and first time marriage). To me true love is hard to come by, so must treasure them.

bro... thanks for sharing...
salute u for ur strength & courage..
hope u all the best in ur marriage...
cheers..:)

[rav_taz]

TS, if u really love her I wont mind whether who she is or where she is from.
Now its the 21st century, already everyone is equal nothing race, nationality.
If you really love her you shld cherish her, she's oso frm a well to do family and is not all out to cheat ur money oso.

I understand that your parents object but our life are short, we shld cherish our own happiness. Things might be difficult with your family objecting but eventually when they knw that you r happy, slowly they will accept you and your gf. I feel that you shld be more decisive and take control of your own life and happiness like wat bro sun814 did.

[ginogrego]

Don't put all your egg in one prata bro.

[IdontKnow]

haha, quite true, my wife has quite a collection of gold, jewelleries, branded watches and handbags when we got married. :p

All earnings from her FL? LOLOL