Personal diary (minimum sexual content)

[Fakeguy]

First of all, I'm not very gd in my english or story writing. It may jump here and there. I jus need a platform to throw out my negative feeling about my life. I know this is a platform more for sex discussion but I jus donno where else I can write out my feeling and mayb get some suggestion from ppl who encountered the same thing. Here's a little introduction of my self.

My Age: 35
Wife age: 30 (office lady)
Son age: 4

I started dating my wife 13 years ago, got married 7 years ago. I'm a person who never betray my partner though I am with my wife for 13 years. Yes, I ever thought of paying for sex but eventually I didn't. Either I jerk off myself or ask for it from my wife. I'm the one doing all the housework as my working timing is very flexible. I'm the one doing cooking whenever I don't need to do any housework on a particular day and also the one doing dish washing. Handle/accompany my son every night and put him to bed. So yes, I'm a lifeless man. Work, housework, dinner and handle my son, that's my daily routine. NO OFF DAY. My wife and I ever named the most loving couple among all our friends. I was named the perfect guy in every "girl" friends' eyes and they even compare me with their partner. And with this name, I continue doing what I was doing even if I'm extremely tired. I still get it done. They praise me in front of my wife and said my wife is so lucky but everytime, my wife would answer "he then lucky". FYI, my wife dont speak up for me even though I was wrongly accused (not those serious stuff but for example, her friend or family would say, why your bf always angry one? She would answer "he's like that one or aiya, nvm lah" but the real reason is she did something against our commitment.She never care to explain to them).

With my full day routine, I lost all my friends. I don even hav time to hav dinner with them. So eventually, they gave up asking me out. which I think it's a gd thing as I also feel very bad when they ask and I cant make it everytime.

If you are curious what is my wife doing, she works office job, 8-5. She's always with us at hm but she's always on her phone either games, videos or social media. She's someone with no initiative and I'm someone who don ask for help. With this, I felt more and more unhappy with my life and I hav no one to talk to for 4 years. that's the reason I turn to here.

In the past, my friends always asked me why dont I join them to KTVs to have fun. My thinking is I'm already attached why do I still need pay for that? My wife is very ON for sexual during the first 8 years. She's open to sex toy, blowjobs and etc. But of cuz not anal, CIM and etc. LOL, etc is what?! Her Dos is simplier stuff and Donts are those slightly disgustings ones.. So why do i still pay someone to do the job? Story make a big turn after she had our son.

To be continue.. wife reaching home.

[DarkkDarren]

this recount hits me hard.. well written bro.

[RustBelt]

Do continue TS

[Banezir]

Good start TS, please continue

[WonControl]

Nice start bro, please continue

[Fakeguy]

Continue..

So after she had our son, we seldom have sex. She always talk about her "out of shape" body. I kept telling her "it's ok, you are still as pretty as before" "You are still attractive to me". afterall, she is the one who is concerned, not me. I used to PM her first when I'm in need but more than often, she will either give attitude when she comes home or do something (especially giving those Piek Chiek face) and turn me off. yes, nothing happen tht night. It is not her body that makes me sick, it's her attitude. I'm more depending to my right hand now. I PCC atleast 3x a week, we have sex once a month or once every 2 months.

Recently, I will go soft when we try to have sex. Idk why. I can PCC without that issue. She is sad so do I. She kept asking what happen? Is she not attractive? But deep in my heart, I'm asking myself am I finally sick of her? Or be cuz of her constant attitude that turn me off? now, I don ask for sex or even sex talk with her. Whenever I'm in need, I will just use my right hand.

Idk if I still love her now. I used to love her deeply and even put her before myself. Even for food, she likes steak. Whenever I'm craving for it during my lunch time, I would just walk into a economic rice store and tell myself "will go for steak with her next time". whatever I do, i will think for her. ask myself "if she does this to me, will I get mad? sad?" If my answer is yes, I wont do it. My friends used to ask me, "Brother, I want to learn from you to be a perfect husband lei". I would always tell them, to be that perfect guy, you will get extremely tired, no time for yourself, everything you do daily is for the family. you still want to be one? LOL, they often wiill change topic after that.

I hate doing housework but I want to keep the house clean for us. But why when I started doing it, she wont do it anymore? Sometimes, i'm so tired after whole day work and housework. The first thing she reaches home is not to priase me or thank me. "WHY YOU WASH SO MUCH CLOTHES""HOW COME STILL GOT SPOTS here on the floor" She would say she will mop very hard so that all these spots will disappear. And deep inside me, I wanted to ask her, when was the last time you mopped the floor? I just don feel that she's thankful but she's just taking me for granted.

I kept hiding all the negative feeling within me. I don have anyone to talk to. I kept asking myself, why do I need to be so tired all the time? There was once, after a tiring day and preparing dinner for my wife and son, my son suddenly threw temper on me and he went "GO AWAY, I WANT MOM". I know he don mean it, but somehow this time it hit me so hard that I felt my heart was bleeding. I walked away quitely. thought to myself, I gave my all to you, and you asked me to go away.... that night went off quick and i'm prepared to sleep. layed down on my bed, thinking and thinking. "Sleep ba, you are so tired already. Don wake up anymore" I thought to myself....

[Johnniesup]

Damn dude, the despair and sorrow - the horrendous feeling of being absolutely taken for granted by someone you love. Continue writing, continue confiding. We will hear you out.

[diputs1269]

So this is the real life of a house husband?

[Fakeguy]

Originally Posted by diputs1269

So this is the real life of a house husband?

well, I'm not a house husband. I'm working as well and my income is higher than my wife. Just that I have flexible working timing that allow me to do the housework and stuff.

[ramon]

Originally Posted by Fakeguy

well, I'm not a house husband. I'm working as well and my income is higher than my wife. Just that I have flexible working timing that allow me to do the housework and stuff.

My situation is somewhat like yours. I earn more than my wife and I run most of the house errands. I wash and fold my family's clothes on weekends, tidy up the house daily because they tend to leave their bags and stuff lying around, which really irks me.

When I tell wifey not to leave things all over the place, she gets pissed. So I just Lan Lan clean up after her.

[eauclaire]

Thank you for sharing nice story.

[otamay]

Originally Posted by ramon

My situation is somewhat like yours. I earn more than my wife and I run most of the house errands. I wash and fold my family's clothes on weekends, tidy up the house daily because they tend to leave their bags and stuff lying around, which really irks me.

When I tell wifey not to leave things all over the place, she gets pissed. So I just Lan Lan clean up after her.

You work like a maid might as well get a domestic helper to take care of the household chores.

[pinkthunder]

Nice sharing of story, thanks very much.

[falleini]

Good start TS, do keep going

[SerflySGR]

Originally Posted by Fakeguy

Continue..

So after she had our son, we seldom have sex. She always talk about her "out of shape" body. I kept telling her "it's ok, you are still as pretty as before" "You are still attractive to me". afterall, she is the one who is concerned, not me. I used to PM her first when I'm in need but more than often, she will either give attitude when she comes home or do something (especially giving those Piek Chiek face) and turn me off. yes, nothing happen tht night. It is not her body that makes me sick, it's her attitude. I'm more depending to my right hand now. I PCC atleast 3x a week, we have sex once a month or once every 2 months.

Recently, I will go soft when we try to have sex. Idk why. I can PCC without that issue. She is sad so do I. She kept asking what happen? Is she not attractive? But deep in my heart, I'm asking myself am I finally sick of her? Or be cuz of her constant attitude that turn me off? now, I don ask for sex or even sex talk with her. Whenever I'm in need, I will just use my right hand.

Idk if I still love her now. I used to love her deeply and even put her before myself. Even for food, she likes steak. Whenever I'm craving for it during my lunch time, I would just walk into a economic rice store and tell myself "will go for steak with her next time". whatever I do, i will think for her. ask myself "if she does this to me, will I get mad? sad?" If my answer is yes, I wont do it. My friends used to ask me, "Brother, I want to learn from you to be a perfect husband lei". I would always tell them, to be that perfect guy, you will get extremely tired, no time for yourself, everything you do daily is for the family. you still want to be one? LOL, they often wiill change topic after that.

I hate doing housework but I want to keep the house clean for us. But why when I started doing it, she wont do it anymore? Sometimes, i'm so tired after whole day work and housework. The first thing she reaches home is not to priase me or thank me. "WHY YOU WASH SO MUCH CLOTHES""HOW COME STILL GOT SPOTS here on the floor" She would say she will mop very hard so that all these spots will disappear. And deep inside me, I wanted to ask her, when was the last time you mopped the floor? I just don feel that she's thankful but she's just taking me for granted.

I kept hiding all the negative feeling within me. I don have anyone to talk to. I kept asking myself, why do I need to be so tired all the time? There was once, after a tiring day and preparing dinner for my wife and son, my son suddenly threw temper on me and he went "GO AWAY, I WANT MOM". I know he don mean it, but somehow this time it hit me so hard that I felt my heart was bleeding. I walked away quitely. thought to myself, I gave my all to you, and you asked me to go away.... that night went off quick and i'm prepared to sleep. layed down on my bed, thinking and thinking. "Sleep ba, you are so tired already. Don wake up anymore" I thought to myself....

I feel for you Bro Fakeguy! Reading your story makes me feel very sad. I know how it feels. At least your wife still gives you sex and she is affected by your performance. This means she does care. Mine doesn't give me any action at tall. My wife made it clear to me she only wanted to have sex because she wanted to bear a child for me.