My tribute to a 'brave' Batam Chiongster

[ahlau]

My dear bros, just tot I opened another thread to share my tots and reflections after having visited my fren at the CDC (who was diagnosed with full-blown AIDs). Anyway I seldom post in SB forum nowadays so may make this last one as a glowing tribute to the bravery of a fellow ex-Batam chiongster who is now sadly facing his dreadful fate from contracting HIV.

(Note: I have no intention of creating and stirring any controversy with this thread, just a true account of somebody I knew and the sad fate that befell him! Also not preaching or pretending to do so or words of worldly wisdom or attention craving whatever, also please do not debate on the dos and don’ts of chionging the right or “wrong way” outa respect to my fren who is dying, as I am in many ways just like many of you out there, a fellow chiongster who many-atimes gives in to the allure of syts and the many temptations of the flesh or flesh trade etc )

Went to CDC today with another fellow ahbeng to visit my fren (let’s call him “Ah T” anonymously for obvious reasons!)

Today was the first time I visited somebody I know with HIV at the CDC. Was surprised at the eerie-ly quiet but strangely peaceful and serene surroundings at the HIV ward of the CDC whereby the lush greenery and spacious surroundings belie the solitude and the dreadful stigma the wards contain….. AIDS!! Three words immediately came into my mind as I scrutinised the landscape……SURREAL, UNSPEAKABLE AND UN-NOTICED! Perhaps the administrators of this great country of ours have intentionally made this place as such because of the unspeakeable nature of this still socially unacceptable disease called AIDs!! Yes, a place so “well-known’ but completely un-noticed despite being located in the heart of the city and there was certainly no hustle and bustle like one would normally see in any hospital ward in Sillypore (in fact, I did’nt see a single visitor in the two hours I was there!!!)

Met the unrecogniseable and extremely frail figure of a man whom I used to know as Ah T, He was somewhat skinny now , mere flesh and bones and certainly looked sad. Coupled with great loss of weight, I also noticed a lot of sores on his body has started sprouting.
However, Ah T still managed to flash a smile of surprise upon seeing yours truly. Guess he was slightly surprised at this ahlau’s visit since this place seldom attracts many new visitors!! Or perhaps bec I ‘smuggled’ a couple of packets of Malboro Menthol to Ah T (which is obviously against Doctor’s orders!) and to which my ahbeng fren jokingly said “why ahlau, you want HIM faster die ah”!! Haha. But in my own summation of things at large, I truly believe that my provision of this little contraband to him is some small measure of consolation admist the desoluteness and despair of his present circumstances..(to be continued in next post!!)

[ahlau]

As always, my fren and fellow ahbeng started a vigorous conversation with Ah T in Hokkien, as all good ahbengs do, with the usual mouthful of expletives and vulgarities which all we ahbengs and fellow Batam chiongsters like to engage in when we are in similar company!! This seemed to lift Ah T’s spirits a bit but when he started talking about his illness and his daily trials , I could quickly detect a lot of sullen nothingness and stark reality in his eyes as he stared back blankly at me!!! When asked, Ah T replied he “Chin KangKor” as he recapitulates his daily difficulties of having high fever after high fever and being unable to sleep and that his body is constantly wrecked with pain. Wonder how to someone cheer up someone else under such dire circumstances, Pray tell???? So just continue to talk cock and try to make the injured party forget his troubles for a while ah!!!

We all continued to talk rubbish, cajoled and joked away with Ah T and in true ahbeng fashion, kept telling him silly things like “Ahya, you bluff bluff one ah, you actually Nothing one ah” and “Ahya, next weekend you sure go Batam again ah!” to which Ah T replied “You Siao ah , you all KNNCB, I going SI liao u still ask me go Batam” and we break out into some laughter which temporarily helped to lift his spirits!.

However, when the conversation turned serious, we found out that Ah T’s family had completely shunned him and none of his 4 sons even bothered to lift a finger to help him, let alone visit. You see my bros, this poor bloke is totally broke, got no money in CPF or Medisave whilst all the doctors telling him that this and that drug can prolong his life but costing several hundred dollars a pill or capsule. To which Ah T replied “for what, pay so much $$$$, siao ah, better faster DIE ah”!! Amidst his painful but heartfelt outpouring of emotions, Ah T instructed us to read out his EPITAPH which he intends to write in Chinese and keep in his wallet so that it may be read out aloud during his funeral wake!!! OMG he’s already anticipating death but what else is there for him to think about during his daily sufferings.

Eventually we asked our good fren Ah T how he seriously felt about his predicament and he replied two words……. BO PIAN and said further in Hokkien that he had accepted his socalled fate because he truly believed that he knew the dangers of his lifestyle then and in simpler terms (after some translation) Ah T is effectively telling me that ….. YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW !! At that moment, I knew that I was talking to one of the BRAVEST MAN I know or ever will know. !!!!!! And so I began pondering on his words and his eventual fate, his brave attitude and all the despair I had seen whilst I was on the slow bus ride home from the CDC to my home in Bedok!


My dear bros, I just like to leave you all with my final tots! Its just total puzzlement to me that in our socalled FIRST WORLD country, first class in everything, computer savvy, high-tech world , a world of million dollar pay increases for top civil servants and billion dollar pharmaceutical companies in abundance and soon to be seen glitzy Integrated Resorts, here like the sad case and episode of my good fren Ah T, someone whose life is slowly depreciating each day till his eventual end because he simply CANNOT AFFORD to extend his lifespan and of course, our great gabra-ment authority in its highest moral standards will simply say, you deserve it bro. Your problem, not mine!!!
Too sad for words, just leave you all with this ‘Serenity prayer’ on behalf of my fren, Ah T (which I believe is said by recovering addicts during the end of each counseling session_.............


GOD, GRANT ME THE COURAGE AND SERENITY TO ACCEPT
THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE,

AND TO CHANGE THE THINGS THAT I CAN

[ahlau]

As I left the CDC, my felt really sunk to a low I never experienced as I recall with such fond memories of Ah T, a fellow Batam chiongster.. What a stark contrast this man i just seen compared to those heady days in Batam where Ah T was always the envy of us chiongsters as he seemed to always managed to sangkut the most delectable and best looking cewek which makes us turn green with envy!!! And Ah T was always the best dressed of us ahpeks, real “stylo-mylo” in his drabs so its no wonder he always gets the cream of the ‘crop’. Alas those good times we spent hand in hand with ceweks in tow drinking away the night in A1 food court and discoing away in Pacific or Planet and having fun. Now reduced to seeing this poor sight of a man in all places, in the CDC!!!

I really do not one to sound preachy but frankly, i truly believe after witnessing this fall from grace, that my fren's fate and wellbeing, Ah T, is now in the hand of GOD (whoever we individually believes him to be!!)

Ahlau signing off once and for all, Take care bros. hope this story shed some enlightenment or watever to all who reads it. I will perhaps post again whenever i come back in SB forum, which unfortunately nowadays is about once a year!!!

Cheers and Best regards!

[youallsonice?]

Feel sad for your friend. But it is true...You reap what you sow.

[naemlo]

Originally Posted by ahlau

Cheers and Best regards!

Bro, it has been more than a year since we last met. Sincerely hope that you are in a better shape now.

Life is unpredictable and full of shits, you won't know what will happen tomorrow. We just have to accept it bravely and live thru life till the fullest everydays.

I always tell my friends who take for granted with family or love ones. "Treasure every moment you have with them, you won't know what will happen next."

No point arguing this and that, he shouldn't this and that. The fact is, it happened and for now you guys can only pray and cruelly wait for the day to come.

BTW all the best to you too.

[justl00king]

Sorry to hear about your friend......all the best.

[no_faith]

life is fragile and unpredictable.

although i do not know u and ur frenz, still all the best.
on the other hand, i tink Ah T will be glad to know who are his real and truthful frenz when he is down.

tis is wat is i call "huan nan jian zhen qin".