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Coffee Shop Talk of a non sexual Nature Visit Sam's Alfresco Heaven. Singapore's best Alfresco Coffee Experience! If you're up to your ears with all this Sex Talk and would like to take a break from it all to discuss other interesting aspects of life in Singapore,  pop over and join in the fun.

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Old 13-05-2013, 10:00 AM
Sammyboy RSS Feed Sammyboy RSS Feed is offline
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Thumbs up Dear Mr Plainclothes Police

An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:



Dear Mr Plainclothes Police,

I must confess that I was stalking you and I sincerely apologise for perhaps… frightening you with my aggressiveness. Oh wait, let me explain.

You see I have a soft spot for a cute guy like you, especially when you are employed under the police force partially funded by the tax I am obligated to pay. This is what made me stalk you throughout the event. Being so shy the way I am, I did not know how to broach the topic… I really wanted to ask you out for tea. Unfortunately you were intimidated and ran away from me. Well, at first you dodged and tried to move into the crowd but I had my stalker-eyes affixed on you. It was not entirely difficult you see… you aren’t very much taller than I am. Perhaps that was why I became so obsessed with you in the first place.

Really, this is embarrassing but yes, I was stalking you. I wished to tell you many things… I wished to thank you for your presence because it made me feel safer as a participant of the event (Singaporeans in Solidarity with Malaysians). Erm… I also wished to apologise to you that because of this event, you probably missed having dinner with your mother. It was Mother’s Day afterall, honey.


Well anyway all of that was before you put your camera in my face and took a picture of me with the powerful flashlight on. What an anti-climax. I wish you had been more polite. By the way, I hope that you’ve taken a good photo of me because I am really not a very photogenic person.

Hmm… I hope you’ve enjoyed the event and hope to see you soon at the next event. Maybe the time round you will be friendlier and we can talk about catching up over a glass of Milo-Dinosaur? ;)

Oh before I forget… do thank the whole team who was there with you too – all 15 to 20 of them – thank you for being there to maintain peace. We really appreciate your presence and hope that perhaps the next time, you can mobilise 50 more officers to keep us company and to make up the numbers. Thank you for coming in solidarity with the Malaysians. I love you, all of you, my dear plainclothes police woman (there was one) and men.

With so much gratitude and love,
Rachel the activist-police stalker




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